My story of Hope of renewed beginnings

How Crisis Planning Saved Me: Finding Safety and Strength in DV and Recovery

I remember the night clearly. The tension in the house was thick, the yelling louder than usual. My heart raced, and I felt that familiar wave of panic—helpless, trapped, unsure what to do next. For years, moments like this had left me frozen or making choices I later regretted. That night was different because I had a crisis plan.

Seeing the Warning Signs

Before that evening, I had learned to notice my triggers. In my past, I would ignore the little signs: the way someone’s voice sharpens, or how my cravings build until they take over. I realized that acknowledging these warning signs early gave me choices instead of leaving me powerless. That night, I felt the tension rise—but I recognized it and knew I could act.

My Toolbox of Coping Skills

I had put together a set of strategies that I could use no matter how intense the moment felt. A few deep breaths. Counting to ten. Sending a quick text to a trusted friend. Listening to calming music in my car. These weren’t magical—they didn’t stop the fear or the craving—but they bought me time to think clearly. That night, I used these tools to steady my shaking hands and racing thoughts.

The Safety Plan That Worked

Part of my plan was practical. I had a small bag packed with essentials: phone charger, ID, a bit of cash, and my important documents. I had memorized a safe place nearby and knew the hotline numbers by heart. When the argument escalated, I knew exactly where to go and who to call. That preparation made the difference between panic and action.

Leaning on My Support

I reached out to someone I trusted, even though my instincts whispered, “Handle it alone.” That call reminded me I wasn’t alone—that support is strength, not weakness. In both domestic violence and addiction recovery, having people who know your story and can respond quickly is lifesaving.

Planning for Recovery, Too

Crises aren’t just about immediate danger—they show up in subtle ways. For me, relapse in recovery often crept in quietly: stress, old habits, or triggers. My plan included a step-by-step approach: notice the urge, use a grounding tool, reach out for help, and remove myself from the situation if necessary. It sounds simple, but in the moment, it’s everything.

Courage Through Planning

That night, because I had a plan, I felt a sense of control I hadn’t known before. Crisis planning didn’t remove the fear, but it gave me a path through it, a way to protect myself and keep moving forward.

If you’re reading this and feel trapped, scared, or overwhelmed, know this: you can create your own plan. You can identify your warning signs, build a toolbox of coping skills, and reach out to people who will support you. Step by step, moment by moment, safety and healing are possible.

You are worthy of protection. You are worthy of care. And you are never alone. 💙